Faldoni, parts 3084 - 3077

 3084. Also, after the chair has disappeared, you will need to look around in the house where the chair was and see if you can find a huge piece of sheet-metal, because shaking a big piece of sheet-metal will produce the same thundering sound. If you find sheet-metal, you should suspect that the chair disappearance was a sham, and was probably just a magic trick.

 3085. If the chair was a part of an expensive set, you can assume whomever made it disappear, knows where it is and intends to sell it behind your back.

 3086. But the Jailer proposed the raising of the dead, as opposed to making chairs cease to exist, and the suggestion found its way to the highest church authorities. At first the idea was dismissed out of hand as being another expression of the superstitious beliefs emanating from the nuisance Cantaloupe man, but to be on the safe side it was mentioned in a weekly report to the Pope.

3087. In the Pope’s reply, there was no mention of Faldoni in the text, however, in a footnote at the bottom of the letter His Holiness mentioned that the painter’s sentence had to be strictly carried out, but perhaps it might be advisable to put it off for a while.