Buboni, Lost In The Woods, parts 248 - 251

Richard Britell June 15, 2012

248. Bernice explained that if the refrigerator was placed where it was it meant that one was facing west when one opened the door.  West is the direction of the setting of the sun, so obviously opening the refrigerator door was inviting death into the kitchen. The object had to be placed so that one looked east when the door was opened.

249. The contents of the refrigerator, on view to Bernice's inquiring eye only confirmed her diagnosis. The thing had to be moved, but it also had to be emptied and steam cleaned. No more baloney, no more Miracle Whip, no more bacon and eggs, iceberg lettuce or Pepsi.  All that seems so long ago now, that period of starvation, and the inconvenience of having to put the refrigerator down in the cellar so it faced in the correct direction.

250. All of those changes did not make things better at home for me. I tried my best to go along with the changes in my diet. I also began to exercise regularly, for the first time in my life.  I would go for a long walk after dinner, sometimes for up to two hours. At first I went out about seven, but I took to going out later and later for my constitutional, and toward the end I would be out from two till six in the morning.

251. I had retired, I had nothing to do. I was sixty-four, and was living like a tortured  prisoner in my own house. I thought to myself, "What if I live to be eighty-eight?  My God, twenty four years of watching television and eating sprouts and tofu?" For the first time in my life I began to hate living, and then I started taking the sculpture class. Mrs. Festini, she was my salvation. But you don't want to know about all this, I'm sure.