3676. The information given to Harriett upset her and caused her such anguish that she was actually beyond tears and even beyond grief. She was incapable of taking it in because it did not seem possible or real to her. First of all she had no idea up until the very moment of his disappearance, that she was so attached to him.
3677. All along she had thought, and told herself, that Alexis was like her favorite toy. You dress up the toy, you play with it all afternoon, but then some distraction arises and you don’t think about it for another month. That is exactly how she imagined she felt about her pretty servant.
3678. His sudden disappearance cause an emptiness to open inside her, the space between the bottom of her heart and the pit of her stomach seemed to have suddenly disappeared, and in its place she found an aching void. She was dry-eyed, silent and troubled by this unexpected grief and went around her afternoon meetings and appointments with a foreboding that the slightest thing could accidentally produce a flood of hysterical tears.